To Sky with Love

Dear Sky,

You fought back your tears today :)

I saw your little Sun frolicking.
You know I miss him deeply.
But I can see he tried so hard to behave.
He told me, he doesn't want you to cry that much anymore.

So do I.

I love you, Sky.
You have been emo a lot lately.
That worries me.
That worries all of us who love you.

Recover soonish.
K? ;)

XX

They will never be mine

Getting emotionally involved in things that are not mine is fu*king torturing.

I mean, I knew it. And I knew it early. But my little one had its very own way of dealing with things. And now see the mess I have to clean.

THEY ARE NOT MINE!!! FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

I am not sure to what extend had my little one done the damage. I tried convincing myself, that everything is under control. But the dreams and dark circles told me it's not. It's on loose. With things getting too comfy, I overestimated myself.

This has to be quick and sharp, I thought. No giving-ins, no way. I can't afford another round of this. Getting possessive with those seriously freaks me out. I don't even wanna think about it.

Yeah right, a gloomy moody me. I blame it on the weather.

It's a cold rainy night, this song I am playing...

The Me Unloading...

As I walked up the stairs, after my dutiful lunch, the usual blank mind of mine, unusually, told me something. I could not help but giving it a careful thought, with the things that happened around me, with the questions that had landed upon me.

There's a loop hole, I told myself.
"Prove it!"
Why should I? When I know.

And I smiled.

There are times when I wanted to give in
And times when I started to do something silly
I pulled myself back. O, did I?

I left myself off stranded
But deep inside I know
To stay within is the way to go

I ain't strong enough to take
I ain't good enough to give
I ain't the one who go fighting till the end and found nothing's gained
So I ain't the one who will go fighting till the end

For the moment? Perhaps, for the thing that worth fighting has not shown.

XX

#31 ...

Wonder why someone will go and start acting like another person, just to go near the crush?

Eh, love is blind eh? CRAP!! for all the things that were mentioned as "Oh, I don't do this... or I don't like that... or I tried, but I... or that's something kid does, not me..." Now its totally the other way round. Working harder than trying to score an A during school time.

Just because that fella looks like an idol, doesn't mean you have to do whatever to grab it. Just because that fella meet your requirement as a dream guy, doesn't mean you have to turn into another person whom you think might please him to please him.

To what extend will it go? If you'd faked the beginning...